Page 61

Maaaaan printing a book is way more complicated than I thought. But we're almost there. In the end I had my book reviewed by a print expert rather than printing a test version for myself and it was better off that way cos boy, did I not know what I was doing.

But now the story is "over". But not without a little extra tidbit:

It was not until I was uploading all of the pages and putting the final copy of the book together that I realised I had skipped an ENTIRE page.

Between page 40 - 41 there's a page that I never included. In fact I never even drew it. I had a rough version of it done, actually it was one or the earliest pages I'd written. And somehow it just slipped under the radar and I'd forgotten the page existed. So I last minute had to draw a new page and slot it into place. I guess it wasn't ESSENTIAL to the story. But I'm thinking it's still important to the general pacing and flow of the story. I do think it's worse off without it.

Anyway, as far as this blog is concerned Tuft Luck is complete.

I've already said a lot in relation to this coming to a close so, not much to say on that front. But uhh..thanks for reading. I think I've said that already too.

If you want to support Tuft Luck, get the book and/or keep up with generally new stuff all information will be available via my newsletter.

https://calvinoneill.substack.com/p/meet-the-horde

 

 

Thanks to everyone who's given feedback, or just been generally along for the ride. I know there's only a few of you who stuck out to the end (I got a few "I'll just wait 'til I can buy the book" which is fine) but it's been really handy to have you guys to commit to and keep me consistently producing pages.

 

This book is finished but there's so much more to come. I hope you'll come back to The House of the Disturbed... 

Page 60

 

The penultimate page!

I'm currently trying to get the pages together to print a test copy, hopefully this evening. I feel like there's a more professional sounding word than 'test', but I can't think of it so I keep saying test copy. OH WAIT! PROTOTYPE. Yes. I'm going to print the proto-copy, hopefully this evening.

So yeah, it's been a wild run and uhhh...I hope you enjoyed the story and found it not to be really bad. I remember imagining this moment, and now we're a week away! What a crazy life. I look forward to re-reading this comic after a long period of purposefully avoiding looking at it again. It could be years, decades even until I decide I want to actually look back at it. My general rule is: if you can still remember the details of what it was like to make, you won't enjoy looking back at it. That's why all of my favourite things that I've made were from when I was 15.

I don't care if I'm a much better artist over a decade later (holy knees and toelys is that how long ago that was???) I'd much rather watch a flash cartoon I made in school than anything I've made since ANY DAY OF THE WEEK. Why? Cos It's extremely distant, so I can appreciate it for what it is. That's why I'm gonna have to wait many years until I look at this nonsense again.

Now the fun part! WHAT is gonna happen in the last page? I'll tell you this right now. There's not a lot that CAN happen on the last page. I'm certainly not introducing a bunch of new story elements and plot points. If anything, I should have asked this last week. Cos I mean really, THIS is the ending right? It even says so in the last panel. Tuft foes are defeated, and now he can kick back and watch TV with a witch and a vampire. Truly a happy ending. Just one more page to put a bow on this thing a year later (or in Tuft's world, about 2 days).

Page 59

 

So I know everyone and their nan is waiting for the conclusion to the bird watching situation. But before we get to that, I've spent my whole life thinking Pix n Mix was Pick A Mix. I guess that doesn't really make as much sense as what it actually is. But I still feel like my whole world has been shattered. Pick N MIX? This whole time? Life is just too much sometimes.

So as for bird watching, at this point I think I might as well cave and give it a try. Well, I say that like I will actually give it a try, but I probably won't anytime soon. But my shame around it seems to be only mildly justified, and the encouragement I've had since is starting to make me feel like I'm in the closet or something. So, arguably being a bird watcher is less shameful to me than being a closeted bird watcher. That's just weird, how much longer can I continue on that path?

Man if this is how being a bird watchers feels, being actually gay must be a nightmare. You think all bird watchers go through this? Where they have to eventually realise and accept themselves? I know the answer is no, but it's funny to believe that it's yes. Man I'm an odd cookie, huh?

Page 58

You ever think about how much more boring we get as we get older? Like I was sitting here, thinking about what to write and I thought...I could talk about the weather. And don't get me wrong, I love talking about the weather. I talk about the weather all the time. It's one of the few things in life we can all agree on. What the weather is. And most of us have similar if not identical opinions on it. See! I'm going on some random tangent about the weather right now!

When I was younger, I thought people who talk about the weather are the most boring, uninteresting people on the planet. Such a dry...unexciting topic of conversation. But you know what? Somewhere down the line (and I'm only 26) I got to a place where I am now fighting the urge to write multiple paragraphs about the weather.

This reminds me of the time I was at a music festival and I got really high, and I confessed one of my dark secrets to the boyfriend of a friend of a friend...

My dark secret...was that I kind of wanted to get into bird watching.

I'm not kidding by the way, I went in to a full on rant about how I would never ever want to be the kind of boring sod who looks at birds, and that I've been fighting the urge to get into it more and more as I get older. Now at the time...honestly I don't even know what this boyfriend guy thought, he was just going along with it. But I recounted this story to my friends at the festival and they were all pretty entertained by the concept that I thought bird watching was an embarrassing hobby, which they apparently didn't.

(5 minutes later)

So alright, I just sent out a couple messages to get feedback on this topic and my friends seem to also think that bird watchers are weird saddos. Although one of them did say it's fine to do on your own just not with a group of old people so...take from that what you will.

I'm not gonna lie, I am for sure relaying this feedback to the initial festival group to get further insight into the wider perspective on this matter.

We need to get to the bottom of whether or not it's lame to bird watch. I will have an update for you next week.

Page 57

 

At some point we did actually pass the anniversary of me posting Tuft Luck, but I failed to realise or mention it. So...happy belated anniversary Tuft Luck. I'm now in the process of prepping the book to print (I don't know if I've said that before) it's surprisingly tedious but I suppose once I've done it once it won't be this complicated again.

I'd like to say I'm gonna miss posting it every week and sharing my thoughts but...I'm not. I'm not gonna miss it. It's not that I've hated doing it necessarily, but even the stress of having to have a page prepared every week is just...needlessly stressful when I've got other stuff going on. But I'm glad to have an archive of my thoughts while I complete my first graphic novel.

This also has gotta be the first project of this size I will have ever seen through to the end. Not counting freelance work. But as far as a personal project goes, this has got to be the most ambitious one so far. Maybe. I dunno. On the other hand I'm an animator, and the amount of work that goes to even one really short animation potentially rivals this project. I've definitely never spent this LONG on a project anyway. So at least timeline wise, it's the longest I've ever committed to a personal project and finished (or it will be when I print it.)

Admittedly, since I never read this stuff after I post it...I have no idea if I've said any or even all of that before. Easily could have. Easily could be repeating myself. If I am...well...consider it a refresher on my personal life. That's all folks. See you next week.

Page 56

 

So, I'm here trying to upload this comic and I get the worlds most annoying text. And now, I'm supposed to write something and...I'm just too angry to think. The only saving grace is that VERY little thought goes into these bits of text anyway (as I feel like I've said 400 times) so I think we will be fine.

But it's crazy right? When these awful, annoying people do they're horrible annoying things. Do they not realise...they're throwing me off my game?! Hello?! I'm out here trying to post the latest page of Tuft Luck guys! Maybe leave me the hell alone so I can give the people what they want! I mean...right?

Also while I'm getting annoyed at stuff, I've had enough of the internet trying to correct all my typing to American English. I'm not American. I'm not in America. I've tried to change the settings but you know how technology is, it's basically all designed to inconvenience ME specifically.

Hmm...what else annoys me? Oh! My neighbours! GOD they've been getting on my nerves these past couple weeks. I swear they don't wake up until 4. Then they leave the house at like..7 or 8. Then at midnight they come back and REALLY start making noise. The other night I was going to sleep (or trying to I mean) and I could hear this loud passionate argument about how the black roommate was being racist to the white roommates because the black roommate keeps trying to trick them into saying the n-word. I can't make this up, this is my life. They're literally playing rave music right now! It's 15:45 on a Tuesday, what could possible warrant a rave right now.

Let's see, what else annoys me? Oh! People who don't respond to emails. You don't wanna respond to text? Sure whatever, I do that all the time. But an email? That's formal. That's important. Don't ignore emails!

Alright, I think I got most of my irritation out of my system.

God I can't wait 'til I start livestreaming and I can be the one to keep my neighbours up in the middle of the night instead.

Page 55

You know how you have some conversations topics that are like...your go to? Like I feel we all have a handful of topics that we're ready to rant about at a moments notice. Things that are kind of easy to bring up in conversation, maybe to varying degrees even.

I'm only thinking about it because I was going to write something about school. I've had a very boring day. One of those really tedious ones where you've got to do a bunch of civilian stuff you'd rather skip. And it got me thinking about school and what a brain melting experience that was for me as a kid. So I was gonna say something about that and suddenly realised, wait. This one of my topics. This is one of those things that when it comes up in conversation, I've got a premade rant ready to go off about my memories. Then it got me thinking about anyone who might read this, who's already heard the shpeel  before. Then it got me thinking. Wait. If I complain about school in writing. It's officially etched down. And then...can I even really CONTINUE ranting about how much school sucked for me growing up? Then I had another epiphany...

Am I STILL bitter about having to go school in my (almost) late twenties? Why is that still something I talk about? Am I really NOT over it yet?

So that's pretty pathetic. I'm not too embarrassed to say that. That isn't my only pathetic trait. I've developed several pathetic traits in my life that I've grown to know and distain. The worst part is, school wasn't even really that hard for the most part...it just always seemed really pointless and stupid...and we'll...it was, I was bang on about that. And I guess that's maybe the part of it I never got over. That I was right the entire time, all of this nonsense was a waste and my childhood was slipping away in this building of adults that more often than not, I don't even really think LIKE kids.

However. I did my GCSEs at 15. It's been over 10 years since I was a school student. That is a silly thing to still be in your roster of rants. I'm supposed to he ranting about sports or women or the government or conspiracies or...okay non of those are actually things I want to rant about. But i can't keep ranting about school. It's over. It happened. It's whatever. The fact I still bang on about it from time to time, is one: a SERIOUS testament to how much I hated that place I mean my God what a mark it left, and two: ...pointless and stupid.

Did you catch that?! School, the most pointless and stupid part of my life (and that's saying something) made ME into someone pointless and stupid. In trying to defeat my enemy...I became my enemy. I've become the human form of school. Accept its not mandatory to listen to me. Which I guess is why so few people listen to me.

And for that, you're all getting homework.

...

Yeah...I don't know what I'm talking about either...I trailed off again...

And this, my hopefully last rant about school, is dedicated to my mum...who is a school teacher😂

(P gridf)

Page 54

 

I think that cake is underrated. Seriously, I just don't think other people like cake as much I do. Like people like cake right. But...people prefer biscuits...CRISPS. Dude, I'd much rather eat a cake than a crisp. Maybe that's a strange comparison, like I guess crisps are a lighter snack. But that's half the issue. Who wants light snacks? You know what else is better than crisps? Banana chips. I actually have to pop to the shop in a second, I might buy some banana chips right now. And no crisps. Honestly, what is this country's obsession with crisps? 

Speaking of this country's obsessions, do less people drink tea nowadays or is it just me?

It's not so much regular everyday people. It's the more hipstery creative types. There's like...an Americanism going on in the middle classes as I swear. People only drink tea if it's like chai or green tea or some bs like that. I don't mind those kinds of teas. I just...I find coffee drinkers suspicious. And I feel like there's a lot of people I've been coming across who are all coffee no tea. And I'm just thinking...what's going on here. What are doing right now.

It's all these American businesses that have come over I'm telling ya. Yesterday I saw an interview with a guy that was saying that America has a huge stake in the UK economy. Like, 4 times as many people in the UK work for American companies compared to places like France and that. And did you know Costa Coffee was owned by Coca Cola?

Thing is, the whole time in this interview they had these really blatant Cafe Nero cups. One of them wasn't even drinking out of it. It made me think this was just a hit campaign against their competitors because Cafe Nero is a UK based company. So they're saying American companies are bad, UK companies are good. So you go to Cafe Nero not costa coffee. Which is a UK based company but...like I said, western coffee culture is an American thing anyway. The guy who founded Cafe Nero (the UK one) is actually American as well. He just LIVES in London. He probably knows the person running Costa Coffee personally from school and that's why he's sneak dissing them.

Anyway here's to cake. Muffins too. And brownies, love a good brownie. Maybe I'll buy some brownies.

Page 53

 Apologies for another late post.

I'm setting a weekly reminder now, I haven't had one for quite some time because I've been doing this every week for almost a year? Posting I mean. Yet...apparently now I forget about it every Tuesday. I'm not sure how we got here. I will say yesterday I was quite busy, had an early start etc and so I can see how it slipped my mind. It is very irritating though. Because I made sure the night before, as I often do, that there was a page ready to post. So to have it ready then immediately forget to post it is just...well I dunno. I feel guilty. I do. I know only a couple of you actually check for this every week and most people won't notice. But all the same...the guilt is there.

Page 52

I go through phases being so on the ball with posting these and then suddenly I just forget to do it each week. Last week I posted it here but then didn't post it on whatsapp 'til like 1am. Ah well.

 

Okay, so apparently there's 52 weeks in a year. But it's been less than a year and I've posted this comic every single week. Accept for that one time I posted two in a week. And that other time I didn't post anything. And that VERY first post where I posted 2 again. But that still only takes as up to next week, which is still like a month before the anniversary of the first post.

Make it make sense? Were we lied to? Do weeks not really have 52 weeks? Is it more? Am I in some kind of time warp? Does Tuft Luck the Unlucky Black Cat DEFY the laws of physics?

Speaking of 62 (I know we were talking about 52 not 62, but it's more or less the same thing no?) For some reason I've been convinced there are 62 pages of this comic. But there are actually 61. So page 61 is where it ends. I don't know which one number I'd written before, but I'm confirming it now. So this kicks off the last 10 pages of Tuft Luck. I hope you've enjoyed his crazy adventure and stick around for the ending.

 

Page 51

Slightly later post today as I've scanned in a big batch of pages. I think maybe all but one page are scanned in now. Still some tweaking to do on a few of the ones already scanned in. But we are now arriving at that crucial point of actually being finished.

 

So yeah, I've been working hard. In fact so hard that I think I might've been a bit starved for attention recently, because I found my self giving random people lip for no reason. I'm not just talking housemates I'm talking strangers in the street. Someone says something to someone behind me, and I assume they're talking to me and start mouthing off. Always with a smile of course. I'm not a monster. It's always clear I'm kidding. But also...I don't realise until afterwards that they weren't even talking to me. I'm not sure what was happening. Is this the first stage of becoming the local weirdo? The thing is it came right off the back of me being less social in my day to day. Thankfully I've been able to see some people since, but it was like my sass mouth quota wasn't being reached and I was just fiending for an opportunity to back talk.

I'm not hooked on smack or crack. I'm hooked on smack talk and cracking wise. Anyone can get it. You just have to talking in earshot of me.

 

On a different note, I went to forbidden planet the other day to check out some graphic novels and in order to figure out what kind of cover I wanted. My worries about making a graphic novel were unfounded. I can't remember if it was here or my mailing list where I was saying that I'm not sure how many pages a graphic novel has to be, I basically just read a couple things online and then got in my head and thought I was making it wrong. But actually, it's really fine. Even the comic being landscape is not nearly as big of an issue as I thought. So everything's fine. We are all good.

Page 50

 

Okay. Alright. I'm just gonna come out and say it already.

There is a running gag in this cartoon that I can't tell if people have picked up on or not. No one has ever mentioned it. But it's been consistently happening in this comic since the opening pages. I think the Catsu Curry page  is where it started. 4 or 5 or 6.

Okay so if you don't know what I'm talking about, go to that page. And it's also on this page. See if you can figure out my cheeky little joke I have been making repeatedly throughout this comic.

Go now!

 ...

Okay, welcome back. Did you figure it out? Did you even LEAVE? Party pooper!

It's the swearing.

Go on check again. See if you can piece it together. Or maybe you already realised?

Every single swear word is censored using various symbols. Except...you can still clearly see the word. The symbols I choose always spell the exact word really clearly, especially the way I draw it.

I'd call it a mixture between a joke and a stylistic choice. It's like, cartoons and comics have this thing they do (the symbols I mean) that imply bad language without actually using bad language. But Tuft Luck (as you well know) ain't that kinda comic. So it's stylistically like a family friendly cartoon, but again...you can very clearly read the work as if it was written normally. To be honest, I think the way it ends up looking is pretty neat.

So that's my joke. I was making it the whole time. Now that we're near the end it's time I come clean about these kinds of things. Also...I didn't know what else to write about today. I suppose this is the comic book equivalent to when an adult comedy is censored on tv, but you still hear like the first and last sounds, so it becomes some pretty f(bleep)cking redundant sh(bleep)t.

But lets all be honest. The swearing doesn't matter. What REALLY should have been censored, was that guy in the cat costume back with Tuft's family. I've counted FOUR perverts in this comic. Or what about that bit where they ate that guys head? Man, this comic is f(bleep)cking nuts.

Page 49

 

More fart chat.

Meanwhile, I think I just ruined another song for myself. Basically, I do this thing where I listen to a song and I get my own idea in my head of what it's about without hearing/understanding all the lyrics. My interpretation is usually pretty RAD but then ultimately I get curious and either look up the lyrics or read some YouTube comment underneath the song or something, that gives me more context. And the context always SUCKS. It's usually not nearly as interesting as my version. And yet, I'm so intrigued by my made up version of how the song goes/what it's about that I always get drawn into looking into it more. Only to disappoint myself by realising it that version doesn't exist! They're just singing about kissing girls or something.

Don't worry, I'm not just here to winge. Instead, I'm gonna throw a quarter of my day away and go through some of these songs and make note of what I thought they were about. Then, when I ultimately pack in drawing cartoons to become an aging rock star (it could happen) I will make songs about those things myself.

 

Happy Tuesday.

Page 48

 

Back to business as usual.

Y'know, this page raises an interesting topic...okay, INTERESTING is a stretch, but it's a topic. I'm talking of course about FARTS.

I NEVER found farts that funny. The reason I find this strange, is because fart humour is quintessential dumb humour, and as I think we're all aware of at this point, I LOVE dumb, idiot humour. The stupider and more off putting the funnier.

But something about FARTS just never really tickled me (although I can see the humour in that sentence). You know what I also never really found funny? Poop! (With the exception of this cartoon https://youtu.be/wtvdoDJ4wXk?si=PEZw0Y3SaqJDZ4vC)  I just never really was drawn to toilet humour. I've drawn my fair share of fart clouds don't get me wrong...but that's just because they feel like such a classic staple of cartoons (probably cos of Ren and Stimpy?) and I can appreciate the silliness of a physical cloud coming out of someone's butt, especially if it propels that butt into flight.

But the sound of a fart? the smell? the assault factor? All the REAL and TRUE virtues of a fart...I just...I dunno, I don't find it funny...if anything it's annoying...I literally crossed the road the other day because a man walked by in front of me and audibly farted. And before I wandered into the stinky mist I just instinctively crossed the road. Didn't even realise what I was doing until I was doing it! That's how grossed out by farts I am! Me! The guy drawing the cat being mutilated and animating clowns throwing pies at each other! I can't stand FARTS.

 

And yet...you can't spell FART without ART. I leave you with that to think about.

No Page Today!

 Remember that time I dropped an extra page for halloween? Well I'm calling it back in! I was just prepping this weeks page, only to realise I was working on the wrong one. Worse is that it was a page I'd already finished,, so I was just wasting time. Anyway, I've sort of let a few things bet past me this week and I had to make a call. If it makes you feel any better, I still have other stuff I need to do! So I will not be resting or relaxing, I will be PUNISHED for my tardiness.

I've got pretty bad insomnia at the moment and so things are falling to wayside a bit. What can you do. I'm sure I'll do my best to get the page ready for next week. I just need rest is all... 

Do not weep for me.

Page 47

 

Since book 1 is drawing to close, I thought I might reflect a little on the comic and the whole experience. I dunno! I'm just trying to come up with stuff to type, y'know?:

 

So some random reflective thoughts in no particular order:

When I was 13 I had a comic strip that I'd draw every week and kids would come up to me throughout the day asking to read the next installment. At the time I felt like a celebrity. In retrospect, it probably wasn't anymore than 10 people. Which is more or less the readership of this comic. Upon revisiting this experience, this is not that many people ('prreciate yall tho).

Drawing a comic is both a HUGE pain in the backside and a deeply rewarding. It really depends what mood I'm in. In that sense, I will opt for doing the next book during bursts of motivation rather than committing to regular drawing.

I hope that I can release a book a year. I have enough material, story wise, for at least 7 or 8.

I thought I was making a graphic novel, which was sort of on my bucket list. However now...I think this is too short to be considered a graphic novel. It certainly FELT long to make. And I don't think it would benefit from being longer than it already is. I don't 100% understand the difference between graphic novels and comics. But someone got it in my head that 60+ pages was a graphic novel. But...I don't think that's true. So I don't know what I've made. It will be clearer maybe when I print it or like...when it's a series of books not just one. I dunno. Tuft Luck is just Tuft Luck.

Most of the thought that went into this story was about the world Tuft Luck is in. Who he meets, where things are...I actually put very little thought into Tuft the character. Surprisingly, he actually turned out to be a fun protagonist. And the fact I did not think about him as much as I should've makes it really feel like he's taken on a life of his own.

Over the course of this comic, I'm pretty sure Debra has begun shrinking.

 

My spelling is SO BAD. In fact in some of these bits of writing underneath I've left out whole words.

As soon as this is done, I'm straight onto book 2. I'm too deep into the process of drawing this cat.

Between this, the new mailing list, and the fact I plan to start a live-streaming show in the near future...inane rambling is becoming an unexpectedly big part of my life (people seem to respond to it).

Page 46

 

First month of the year almost over. All n all been a positive month, so hopefully a good sign for 2025. On a random side note, I like how 2025 looks. Something about those numbers are appealing together. 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, 2024...ugly years! A terrible collection of numbers. But 2025. Now that's got some style to it. That's a number I want on my...my brain immediately went to the word "tombstone" but I do not want the year 2025 on my tombstone. I think that was just the only thing I could think of that a person has that has years on it. That doesn't change. I still can't think of anything else. But I still don't want 2025 on my tombstone. Just a year as attractive as 2025.

Actually, I don't even think I care to have a tombstone. Just cremate me or launch my body out of a catapult or something. Yeah, catapult my body into the ocean. Or use a giant slingshot like angry birds. Try to knock some blocks over with it while your at it. That's all I ever wanted to do in life anyway. Knock blocks over. But life got too complicated and I don't play with blocks anymore.

Page 45

Fourth panel I meant to write want, not wast.

So yesterday I was preparing my post for my new mailing this (yes I'm still talking about it) but I opted to do monthly posts. N' y'know what? SO MUCH EASIER. You know what you lot are? Spoiled. That's what you is. New page every bloody week. I can barely keep up. And most of you don't even read it each week! But I set a precedent didn't I. And I DO have a sneaking suspicion that I actually WOULDN'T get these pages done if I didn't have to keep posting em here.

The real issue is. I'm ahead of myself. Page wise yeah. Drawn, inked. But y'know where I've fallen behind? Bloody rubbing out pencil marks underneath. It's SO BORING. Page after page RUBBING OUT the drawing in pencil underneath the pen. Soooooo dull. Also, had this weird realisation that I do not need to COLOUR the pages with pen. By colour, I just mean black. There's a lot of black on the page. All the black on this page your looking at, Tuft's fur...Debra' hat. Coloured in black with pen. But here's a question...why? I can just fill it in digitally with a couple clicks after I scan it. I've probably lots WEEKS to colouring in every page diligently. And we're on page what now? a hundred and five? Oh no, I just checked. Fourty something. Well it's still a lot of pages!

Ugh, getting myself all worked up.

Page 44

 

Something about this page reminds me of being a young artist. I don't know why. Maybe it reminds me of something I saw years ago. But what's interesting about it is that it reminds me what it felt like to constantly be discovering and being inspired by things. It's not like things don't inspire me now, but it's different when you're much less defined in your own individual style as an artist. I'm now at a point where I'm well informed about various styles and art scenes. So I'm not constantly discovering new things in the same way. Occasionally maybe, but rarely.

But broader than that...it's interesting how I will potentially never feel that way again. Or not for some time. Like that was what it felt like to be a certain version of me at a certain time. I guess this is kind of dumb/obvious but I suppose I don't often view emotions as like...time based. All I mean by that is that I think about things like, happy sad angry etc as more in the moment things. Like things make you angry or they make you happy. But something I haven't thought about that much is how some of the more nuanced emotions that are kinda there in your neutral state...they can just kind of...disappear one day, or get overwhelmed by something new and just never come back.

I'm not trying to be gloomy or deep or anything like that. I mean one of those emotions is like...how exciting getting sweets used to be. Like I don't really care about the fact I don't feel that way anymore. I just remember it. I suppose the part of it that really interests me about it though, is the fact that I don't think it's possible to know which feelings are temporary. Cos you get so used to it...at least for me, I don't even think I realise I'm feeling it until after. Like I didn't NOTICE that I was excited discovering new art. I was just drawn to it naturally. I can only really sort of define the feeling now that I don't feel it anymore. And I feel that way even about things a few years ago.

I suppose things are just clearer in retrospect. It's kinda nuts though, like I'm sort of very logical but half emotion driven for sure. So in a sense, I'll never fully understand why I'm doing what I do until after I've done it. For better or worse. I mean, not to say we aren't all like that.

Anyway, I'm not moved by art as often or in the same way, (everything's more intense when you're younger, right?) but I still enjoy making it. So that's good enough for me.

Also I am enjoying the new Ninja Turtles TV show. Good ol' ninja turtles. Never went off that for whatever reason.

Page 43

So remember how I said that my mailing list was just going to be directly copied from my posts here?

Well turns out I didn't write anything for the first like 16 pages...so I actually am having to make new content for those posts. This week I showed off some concept artwork for Tuft, including my original design for the book cover. So yeah, you can see that HERE if your interested and maybe subscribe to the mailing list after all.

Don't worry, I'm not going to keep advertising my mailing list to you every week. Not because I respect you enough as your own audience. In fact it's because I don't. There's like 4 of you. I don't care what you do.

That being said I also can't keep talking about my mailing list cos like I said...I plan on copy and pasting most of this stuff TO the mailing list. So...yeah next week lets something a bit more copy and pastable.

Actually, thinking about it. You guys are the real ones for sticking with Tuft Luck before the hype so to speak. So Okay, you've earned my respect after all.

I won't forget you when I'm famous (I'm lying).